Thursday, August 9, 2007

Marie's Dirty Little Secret



Each time Marie comes to work, she clocks in, says hello to the people at the front of the store, and happily walks to the pharmacy department. She seems like the image of perfection. All the young girls at work long to be like Marie: pretty, confident, intelligent, and friendly. That is, until now! Rite Aid Trash has finally uncovered the truth behind this seemingly innocent girl...

Marie's suspicious behavior was first noted in the pharmacy department. After returning from a cigarette break, another pharmacy employee noticed something very peculiar:



"Marie ran out of singles, which is pretty common. But then, instead of calling a manager to get her change, she pulled hundreds of dollars in singles out of her pocket and made change herself! I don't know how someone could have so many singles on them..."

Although many of the Rite Aid employees jumped to conclusions that Marie must have another job where she was recieiving tons of tips, all in singles, no one really could think of such a job. But one day, a manager caught Marie doing something very shocking:



"I was straightening random items in the aisles so it looked like I was working when I was really talking on the phone, when I suddenly noticed her! Marie was standing in the card aisle, holding onto a pole! I thought she was just trying to move it or something, but the way she was moving kinda looked like she was dancing on it!"

Carrying a lot of singles... dancing on poles... What could Marie's other job be?
Before Marie left work last Thursday, a source close to the employee overheard her talking on the phone:


"Hey Back Door Betty. This is One Night Nancy. Can you tell Dirty South Sandy that I'll be a little late and ask if she can go on for me? Thanks!"

The evidence is hard to ignore. It seems that Marie is finally exposed for what she really is: a stripper! Now that the truth is out, it is only a matter of time before the other employees catch on to her lies and lose all respect for her.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

jeff will be heartbroken to learn this news...- tony